Tuesday, March 30, 2010

to love science

Oh Science, I am utterly your captive. I have long been fascinated by the intricate art of your being. I must say, however, that I am rather partial to Biology. That is not to say that your other branches are lacking, for certainly sweet Chemistry has his virtues. Chemistry always had a more masculine aura about him; he focused on rules, order, explanations, explosions, reactions, and many other boyish things. Chemistry was also prone to cut out all whimsical fancy, simply because he was always a sucker for the facts. He was, despite his interesting disposition, cold hearted and detached. I tried on numerous occasions to become better acquainted with him, but he proved to be uncompromising.
Biology on the other hand, was my match made in heaven; she embodies a more feminine spirit. Essentially, Biology is the study of life, and what could be more beautiful and endearing to the human spirit? With Biology, I envisioned a master plan. I saw life in motion, with a grace not unlike poetry. The systems and circles were ever entwined and moved with each other in a choreographed dance. I saw the ecosystem, the population, the individual, the cell, and all the workings thereof. I beheld the brilliance of the organization. I have come to think endearingly of Biology as my breadcrumbs from God. While it is true that many things remain in the dark, enough is revealed to know that there is order and purpose with every step. I literally see God's hand in all things as I study biology and I marvel at the extensiveness of such a design. All of the known facts of Biology could be considered a single bite of cake, you simply don't need the whole thing to know that it is good. Biology catered to my imagination, satiated my spiritual quest, and feed my zeal for nature.
I am not trying to say that I love women in an un-platonic sense (because I don't, I'm rather fond of men) when I state that I am partial to Biology, but simply that Chemistry, being a man, is an entity that I can hardly relate to and have an even harder time comprehending. After all, what woman has ever been able to truly comprehend a man? for if she had, then she would have become the keeper of the world's best kept secret and I would think of her as a wretched being for not sharing such a treasure with her other female colleagues. No~ He tended to focus too much upon the intricacies of the molecular science; like a photograph that has been zoomed entirely too much upon a certain focal point and the fullness of the picture can neither be seen, nor appreciated. If a particular branch of science were to sing a siren's song to me, then I must be honest and say that is was Biology that truly reached out and plucked my heart strings and gave me a love for science.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

yes, I am quite the dastardly character...

On numerous occasions I have been accused of being an overly dramatic character that oozes sarcasm and a cynicism that few can compare to; this allegation, however, is only ever formulated over my internet musings. I think my beloved, simple, misguided followers have confused this characteristic as being truth, when it is in fact an outpouring of my humor. When I post something dark and slightly comedic, it is not a cry for help, nor is it bespeaking of suicidal intentions (in other words, please stop telling on me to my mother, I know who you are... you accost me in the grocery store and tell me not to be so negative~ you just don't get my humor you simpleton [and yes, I'm banking on you not reading this, so if you are.... well.... I really don't care, I repeat. stop. telling. on. me.]) My humor can be explained no better than in the great words of Mel Brooks, "tragedy is when I cut my finger, comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die."
A SECOND point would be, perhaps you read my postings and see over-dramatic things, when really, I am just extremely effective at communicating feelings. Why should you judge me because I'm better at expression than you, a robot devoid of human feeling. You know what they say, we all have our talents and I just have a way with words, whereas you have a way with being nosy, prying, and incredibly misguided.
THIRDLY, when has sarcasm been a sin? I would have been struck down my lightening ages ago if such a thing wer.....*ZAP! BOOM-shakaLAKA* haha just kidding ~ admit it though, you were on the edge of your seat, reading my every word, knowing that my end was eminent with 10,000 volts of pure white revenge. But again, you are misguided, and wrong. oh so very wrong. just sit there in your wrongness and be wrong. I can never be wrong, I got a wrongness immunization. Going back to my argument....
Methinks you also confuse sarcasm with superior wit. You just call my superior wit sarcasm because you have no way to combat my levels of intelligence, so you dub it with a term that has a negative connotation. You can call your toad a prince, but your toad's molecular integrity will never change into a man, with royal lineages and fortunes; just like my superior wit, can never be unjustly labeled as pure sarcasm (although I am rather fond of the utilization of this method of communication, I see it as the nice way of saying "A-duh. you are an idiot.") Yes, I'm aware the analogy does not really apply to this situation unless inversed, but I wanted to use it anyway, its just so delightful.
I would give you more points, but I know that people afflicted with wrongness suffer from brain implosions upon too much rightness. Well chaps, this has been a marvelous chat~ but I have a date with sleep and we are planning on doing lots of dreaming together, about rightness and how wonderful I am. Goodnight.

in the beginning, there was me....

So, I have yielded and created yet another internet profile for the manifestations of my personality. I have three main reasons for doing so:
A. My personality is so obese, that one website cannot fit all of its outpourings
B. perhaps I can ditch my facebook stalkers
C. A blog is for big people, and I consider myself an adult.

that being said, behold my soul.

ps. this is not what you might think it is. this is not a mormon-mommy blog. I don't meet several of those qualifications, I am not married and I am childless. this is more of a "I am so awesome, come read and see of my awesomeness for yourself" blog